Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
