We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
