Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
