found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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