I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize