Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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