So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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