try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Randomize