i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize