Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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