Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
