i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
