I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
