I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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