Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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