Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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