oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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