Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize