It's like a parade of train wrecks.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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