the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
