She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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