They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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