ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Still dying that you shit outside
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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