This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
