with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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