And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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