I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
