Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
