we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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