As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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