What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Randomize
