Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
