This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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