Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You took a bar mat shot.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Randomize