As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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