i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
