i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
