i'm signing you up for texting rehab
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
