I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
