I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize