You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
