Got a toothbrush?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
