question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
not ubering you a puppy
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