Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
