Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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