You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
