ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
