This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
