Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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