i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
