My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
